I could have started with the over-used “once every four years…” but I won’t simply because you would know I was talking about the World Cup. It has reached a stage where even a 70-year-old grandma would have an inkling that the World Cup is on the way. At this very moment, Poland v. Ecuador is showing live on Astro. I watched the highly entertaining Germany v. Costa Rica match with my fellow “pundits” at the obligatory mamak. It was great to be out there, with a bunch of guys who share the same passion for the beautiful game.

The fact that I’m in the midst of my semester break, and the European timing not that dissimilar to English Premier League matches make this THE World Cup for me. Think about it, by the time the next World Cup in South Africa comes around, I would be working. Unless it’s my god-damn company or the boss has some weird idea about productivity, I doubt I would be able to catch the entire tournament as I could AND would this year.

Let’s not waste any time now, and start with some early predictions (and hopefully, a light-hearted one).

Group A
I wasn’t surprised at all when Germany was drawn in this group, one of the relatively easier ones. Like France in ’98, it appears that the European Union has been more effective in getting favorable draws for their members than actually running a “Euro-republic”.

If Germany don’t qualify, expect to see some defects in your BMW or Mercedes as German workers might finally give up at the ineptitude of the German government who can’t even get a football team right. It’s amazing how far they’ve fallen from their football throne, and also their economic might. Perhaps they need the Klinsmann approach to their economy – go Americana!

The second spot is a bit tougher to choose. Most would go for Poland, simply because they’re European based. Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Ecuadorians doing well as they seem to have adjusted to the lower altitude in Germany. I guess this whole “altitude” stigma was stuck as the Ecuadorians seem impenetrable at their home 4,000 meters above sea-level. But I think the European summer weather is not dissimilar to the Latin mountains, so they could have adjusted better than most expected.

Group B
I hate to say I’m an England supporter simply because there’s too many of them in Malaysia, and people usually equate us as being EPL lovers who only support England because we only know English-men. I’m sure that is true for some, and I do admit the EPL has somehow imparted a very “English” frame of mind in analyzing football. However, this year, I truly believe the English squad has the necessary personnel to at least go to the quarter finals, where they would either meet Holland or Argentina.

What I hate most about supporting England is the whole hype surrounding the team. It seems like every teen-wonder is the saviour from God, and the average centre-back being made like a colossus. I’ll take Vidic anytime over Rio Ferdinand, or Schwen-susah-nak-eja over Theo “Who?” Walcott. Nobody knows who Bastian Susah-nak-Eja is, or for whom Nemanja Vidic is playing for BUT everybody knows Theo Walcott plays for Arsenal and Rio missed a damn drug test. England are good, but way over-hyped.

Sweden will be second in this group, unless Paraguay springs some nasty surprise. I would not be surprised that the second placed teams would be sorted out through goal difference. Trinidad & Tobacco…sorry, Tobago…are here to chill out and enjoy themselves.

Group C
This truly is the Group of Death. Most Malaysians will probably underestimate Ivory Coast and Serbia but trust me when I tell you, there could be a surprise coming from this group. The two leading nations, Argentina and Netherlands will cancel each other out and then it’s up to the two remaining matches against teams which are made to be physical.

I believe that Serbia and Montenegro could upset either one of the big names. But realistically speaking, Holland and Argentina head into this World Cup as the outside favorites thus there’s every reason to expect them to qualify. In Pekerman, Argentina has a manager who is experienced in such competitions, albeit for a different age group. However, it is extremely important to have a manager who is used to such tournament and in Pekerman they have a tactically adaptable coach who has turned Argentina into a more fluid, attacking team harking back to the days of Maradona. Unfortunately, they have not been impressive in friendlies against European teams in Europe.

Which I why I would go for Holland as the group leader. They have a young, exuberant coach, Van Basten, who makes up for his inexperience by being tactically astute and strong in will. Holland has one of the youngest, least experience squad heading to Germany, but their qualifying campaign in a very strong group suggest that Van Basten couldn’t care less who played, as long as they play his way. The Ajax system of the diamond 4-3-3 is favored, though there is more emphasis in protecting the back line than pouring forward. Total football needs team work rather than individual brilliance, which the Dutch appears to be lacking, what with injury to the stylish playmaker Van Der Vaart, but they will do well in this group.

Group D
Mexico, not Portugal, is the seeded team in this group, which I believe, would suit Portugal well. There appears to be a common belief that the Portuguese are good enough to trash the minnows, but not good enough against the big boys. I beg to disagree. The Portugal squad is the dark horse in this tournament, more likely to do well than the over-rated Czechs. Most importantly, the have Big Phil Scolari as their manager. It can never be underestimated the worth of having someone with experience leading the team.

I like the fluid 4-2-3-1 formation favored by Scolari. Particularly keen to impress this tournament would be Christiano Ronaldo. Though his club form has been somewhat patchy, Ronaldo appears to be at ease with Scolari’s system which seems to bring out the best in him.

Mexico will do well in this group, with the most likely competition coming from Iran, and even then not a strong one. I have a problem with this group because simply both Mexico and Portugal would qualify, at the expense of bigger names pooled in tougher groups like Group C or Group E.

Group E
People say that Group C is the Group of Death, but I find it hardest to predict the qualifiers from Group E. Old favorite Italy is under-rated at this tournament, and yet I believe the pessimism surrounding the team is understandable considering the lack of big name stars in the line-up and the decline of Italian football in general.

However, Lippi has done well in moulding a proper team, rather than a collection of egocentric individuals. Gilardino and Luca Toni are not household names, but by the end of the tournament I believe they will be the new Vieri and Inzaghi. The most problematic aspect of this Italian team, unbelievably, is the lack of world-class cover for the pairing of Nesta and Cannavaro.

The problem for them is the fact that the rest of the group consist of teams who play differing styles and play them effectively. The United States play a fast running game, full of physically fit and well-conditioned players. They are the up and coming team in World Football.

The Czechs are over-rated in my opinion. It’s not that they’re bad, far from it. Nevertheless, to say they are one of the outsiders for the Cup is a bit far-fetched. Their moment of glory was in the Euro 2004 Qualifying Rounds where they notched up impressive wins to top their group.

My bet to be this year’s Senegal would be Ghana. Physically strong and imposing, Ghana now possess some fine names which would undeniably warrant more attention from the general public. They would fight for the second spot, with probably goal difference separating them.

Group F
There is a reason why everyone thinks Brazil is the firm favorite to be World Champion again. Unlike other contenders, the majority of the players in their first 11 can arguably be said to be the BEST in their position. Emerson, Kaka, Ronaldinho, Ronaldo, Cafu, Lucio, Ze Roberto, Dida and even old Roberto Carlos would arguably walk into most side in their respective position. Genuinely world class in every sense of the word, it would surprise me if they didn’t get maximum points from this group.


Choosing the second team would be a harder test. My heart says Japan, but they lacked the teamwork in play like they did in 2002. This is probably because they now believe they have the players who can dictate the game without using the traditional minnows tactics of running their socks off and all-out pressing. It would be foolhardy to discount the Japanese, but the face stiff opposition, not from Croatia but from Australia.

Australia’s strength is not their players, as often believed, but their tactical guru Guus Hiddink. He has harnessed a squad that has experienced playing a South American powerhouse (Uruguay) and defeating them. Tactically, the Aussies have capable players who are adaptable, but they lack the fluency that is often the hallmark of Hiddink’s teams. This they compensate by being brutally physical, but their lack of class in defence would prove to be their undoing.

Group G
People write off France because of their lackluster campaign to World Cup and their ageing stars but they have failed to realize, like Portugal, the draw has been favorable to the Les Bleus. Drawn in a group which contains Togo, South Korea and Switzerland, it would be a surprise if they did not finish first. It’s often been said that their trump card is Frank Ribery, but I wouldn’t put it past Thierry Henry to exercise the demons which haunts his play in the national team. If Henry can play like he did with Arsenal, then Zidane’s lackluster display would be irrelevant.

Second place would go to either South Korea or Switzerland. Unfortunately for Asia, I predict that Korea would struggle, especially against the very impressive and physically imposing Switzerland. The Swiss plays with a quiet efficiency that tends to make others take them lightly. They have no big name stars, with the most famous player being Senderos! Just like their banks, watches and cheese, the Swiss will do things quietly but effectively.

Group H
This has got to be the weakest group in this whole tournament. I would even say that if Sweden were in this group, they would come out tops. The only big-name team in this group is Spain, and we all know how they choke when it comes to big tournaments. They have failed to impress me in qualifying, with Aragones seemingly unable to harness the young talents available to work as a unit. Everyone would love to see Fabregas play, but Aragones would most likely stick to Xavi and Alonso. Torres is over-rated, while Raul is struggling to find his form. Nevertheless, it would be a huge upset if they’re not first.

There is of course the possibility that they would not even qualify to the next round, as this group also contains Ukraine and Tunisia. Tunisia??? Yes, Tunisia. Unlike their previous appearance where they were drawn in tougher groups, this time around Tunisia has as much of chance to qualify to the next round as Ukraine. Ukraine rely too much on Andriy Shevchenko, but if teams mark-out Sheva, then the whole set-play would crumble.


Players to watch
Bastian Susah-nak-eja (Germany), Lukas Podolski (Germany), Luca Toni (Italy), Joe Cole (England), Riquelme (Argentina), Kaka (Brazil), Nakamura (Japan), Landon Donovan (USA), Beasley (USA), Essien (Ghana), Rosicky (Czech), C. Ronaldo (Portugal), Sneijder (Holland), and of course Ronaldinho (Brazil).

Fast forward to 2006, and I am no longer that naïve young man gawking at the Yokohama girls. Confident, educated, and a whole lot more experience with girls left me with the distinct impression that I wasn’t going to pay any attention to the bevy of beauties on show. The fact that I am now one of those who has not missed a single issue of Autocar Asean since its launch in Malaysia a few years ago made me even more confident that I was going to thoroughly enjoy the event for the right reasons.Armed with a pretty impressive looking Olympus E-500, I head out to PWTC with my best friend, Dhan.

It wasn’t long before I was pissed with something (as regular readers might have noticed). I can’t find a proper parking space that does not cost a low-wage earner weekly income! Anyway, I was quite simply delighted to discover that my University ID can be handy when it comes to the issue of discounts. At RM5 only, I felt that it was a bargain.

The first thing I noticed was the number of people there. This must have helped MAA in its bid to make KLIMS the premier motorshow event in ASEAN in the coming years, rivaling that of Thailand.

I was bitterly disappointed with Proton for making their stand such a non-event, from the use of lackluster props and, forgive me for being a tad rude, not-so-pretty girls. It should not have been such a big factor, if it wasn’t for the fact that the product on display wasn’t that impressive either. It was dull and unexciting, with the exception of the Lotus APX concept car.


The rest of Hall 1 was not that impressive either. I was impressed with the funky looking yellow Swift Sport. I like the Cowboy theme used by Modenas. As for the rest, well…let’s just say that Trucks and Buses don’t really set my heart on fire.


Hall 2 was much better, and livelier. This is probably helped by the fact that as soon as you entered it you are greeted to a very mean looking Renault Kangoo. I never thought that an ugly car like Kangoo can look appealing, but after seeing this jacked-up version, I want one! Renault was inventive in its approach, and there’s one Kangoo dressed up like a 70’s hippies van. The girls are even decked out in flower-motif dresses. Talk about psychedelic!

Hyundai gave us, well, Hyundai. However, I must say that I am mightily impressed by the new Santa Fe and its bold lines. Not so impressive is the interior of the NF, Azera and its ilk. Looks good on the outside, but left wanting inside. The girls could learn to be a little bit more cheerful, IMHO.

Nissan was very businesslike in its approach, the girls in drab suits. There’s a weird circus act in its presentation where there are guys busy bending their body around each other. Though I think the presentation sucks (too drab, too serious), I was delighted to see a proper concept car in the shape of the Nissan Sports Concept. I was again flabbergasted at the sight of the 350Z Fairlady (Dream car 1).

The In-Car-Entertainment section also gave us a pleasant time with some seriously loud speakers and gorgeous girls. Particularly impressive were the Yokohama girls (AGAIN!). More on the girls later… The Brabus set-up was quite impressive in concept and execution. You really felt that you are special when you’re in their zone. Naza, riding high on its recent two launches, showcased the sports concept version of the Sutera and Bestari. Looks great, though I can’t understand why car manufacturers would want to drab their concept car in black. It should stand out!

Hall 3 was even more impressive as here we find the Peugeot stand where the sweet-looking (though badly reviewed) 407 Coupe makes its Malaysian debut. Whether it’ll be on sale is unclear, but the 307 Cc definitely is. Perodua took a much bigger space this time around, though I personally think it was wasted on cars that you can find on any clear day at those Sunway workshops.

Mitsubishi didn’t offer anything much for petrol heads, though their girls are perky, amicable and camera-friendly. Mazda, with its Zoom-zoom motto, showcased their entire passenger car range, with the superb MX-5 (dream car 2) on display and the beautiful concept Cx-7, which looks ready for production anyway.


The Volvo stand attracted a huge audience for two reasons. (1) They had great looking cars (2) They had good looking girls. Plus, the whole stand was well thought out. The C70, which is due to make its debut later this year in Malaysia, was well-received though the pictures doesn’t really show how big this car is. Not for teenagers then. Perhaps the C30 can settle that conundrum. Also on display was the 3CC concept car.


Toyota showcased a few concepts but none impressed me. It looked too ultra-futuristic. The Toyoto supermini, Yaris, is on sale right now, but at the price it’s being offered I think a Suzuki Swift would be a better answer.


I like Ford’s 4Trac concept, with its imposing front grill and muscular bodyline. Also on display was the Ford Focus ST, in quite simply stunning orange paint, though sadly this won’t be on sale in Malaysia.

There was Honda at the next hall. In fact, the whole hall was split evenly between Honda and Mercedes-Benz. Honda featured two great-looking concept car, the boring-sounding Sports 4 concept and the FCX concept. However, I was more impressed with the Modulo-kitted new Civic (dream car 3). Unfortunately, there was no sight of the now-famous yellow Civic Type-R recently launched by Jenson Button.
Mercedez-Benz had its usual range of cars, and not so unusual in the shape of the McLaren SLR (NOT the greatest car in the world, but damn it looks sexy).

The surprising thing for me was that the most awe-inspiring display of sexy motoring was given not in one of the main halls but in a small hall wholly controlled by NazaWorld. On display was a collection of the most desirable sports cars out there, and one not marked by the term “Concept”. I don’t care if there are no models hanging around. The sight of red Enzo, black M6 and M5 (dream car 4), 997 Carrera, Carrera GT, Lambo Gallardo (dream car 5) and Pagani Zonda is enough to cover my entrance fee.


GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS
I would have thought I would have outgrown it, but there’s something about these girls that fascinates us men. The combination of muscular looking cars and demure looking ladies are a sight to behold. However, I must say that I am possibly bored of the generic looking skimpily dressed fair girls manning the stand. I can’t differentiate the girls from Bridgestone to the one from Honda. Perhaps that’s why I was a bit giddy at the Perodua stand because, well, they were the only Malay girls there.

Though I admire them, I do respect them. This aspect seems to be lost to some of the guests, who talked and treated these ladies as objects rather than human beings. I am particularly miffed with guys who take pictures with these ladies while hugging them.

There’s this one MALAY guy who had the gall to slowly slide his hands to the ass of one “showqueen”, and I was glad she managed to politely ask him to stop. It was embarrassing to say the least to witness these incidents. Then there are those who do nothing but just stand there and stare…stare…stare…Even I got a bit annoyed, so I imagine the girls must have it harder.

At the end of the day, though I hate to admit it, without these girls my verdict for the show would be much-much different.


Here’s to sweet dreams of a hot car…

I know it’s been 2 weeks since the whole “follow or be whipped” controversy surrounding Barisan MPs, and in this particular case, the Backbenchers, but I do believe in giving my two-cents worth on the topic. It’s better late than never.

It has been a long-standing parliamentary practice to follow the party line in voting on matters. As a general rule, you are not supposed to vote in favor of an opposition’s motion. The whole concept, though crude and undemocratic on the face of it, is necessary in the political arena.

However, the general rule must come with exceptions, otherwise there comes a time when it leads to absurdity. The United States Congress and Senate is a prime example of a political system where the representatives are allowed to vote according to the motion presented, though their system has that other, more evil shackle known as “the lobbyist” who, some say, is more powerful than most White House officials are.

The exceptions should come in cases such as the one presented before the Dewan recently. The Opposition wanted to push through a motion for a parliamentary enquiry into an MP involvement in “pressuring” Custom officials. The MP told the Custom officials to close one eye when it was discovered that the timbers brought in by a Malaysian company had exceeded certain measurements placed by Custom.

It is a pity that the Backbenchers, the MPs, had to witness a Datuk Shahrir, great believer of democracy and political righteousness, resign as the BBC President when his appeal that his colleagues support the Opposition motion was met with stony gaze.

As it turns out, the MP in the centre of this political storm, had more questions to answer when it was discovered that he has an interest in that company, AND he is also the sole proprietor of ANOTHER company which has been involved in some illegal activities.

How did I know all this? I have to thank New Straits Times for its in-depth coverage of the issues. They supported Datuk Shahrir, and in a prime example of the power of investigative journalism, proceeded to dug up records and showed Malaysia the truth. I applaud NST for this.

I don’t read NST that often, as I find the TheStar being more compact, easier to read, and contains more things to read. But sometimes I realized that the NST is more willing to give in-depth coverage over things that matters, rather than the more pop-oriented leanings of the Star.

In any case, Pak Lah and Najib (the Chief Whip), issued a directive that all Barisan MPs must toe the party line or face the whip. It was an opportunity gone begging. It was a chance to change the political landscape, to allow voting on your conscience. I guess Malaysia is not ready for the change. However, who decides? Shouldn’t we, the people, have a say in how our MPs, the people who we choose, act in Parliament?

Congrats Barca!

It wasn't the match that most of us expected, but enthralling nonetheless. The better chances went Arsenal's way, or in truth, Thierry Henry's way. He single handedly tore through Barca's defence, with one particular memorable run down the touchline taking out Carlos Puyol (Club Captain, continental hardman, Spanish rock) and Rafael Marquez (Mexican stallion, cultured defender). Alas, when one Swede ran his socks off and gave Barca's midfield the runaround (Ljungberg), it was his countrymen who proved to be the difference, and unfortunately that man was in the opposing team. Henrik Larsson, in his swansong season in a top side, showed that dreams do come true in football.

Here is a man who has served his butt out for one club, broke a lot of records along the way, and finally decided he was going to try his hands at one of the top clubs. In the most amicable of separation, Larsson and Celtic parted ways like old friends knowing they have done the same thing one too many times. The fans waved him goodbye, knowing that he would always be their legend.

Larsson, despite ending his topflight career in Barca, will forever be synonymous with Celtic. And so it proved, on a night when he was wearing the stripes of Barca, he still made an impact on Celtic. His two assists, leading up to two goals, proved to be decisive and important for Celtic as it made sure Celtic did not have to go through pre-season Champions League qualifiers and straight to the group stages.

In any case, I would applaud Barca for sticking to their close passing style and tight triangles even though they could have easily gone the route one way. They were not the best team that night, but in open play through out the campaign, they have shown the world that in modern football, there is still room for JOGA BONITO!

FOOTBALL FEVER

I know that football is not universal enough for those who read this blog, but it is a major part of my life. No, I am not a professional football player, though that dream still lives on even at this ripe age of 23. Heck, every football fan in this world dream of someday getting a call from Alex Ferguson, Jose Mourinho or whomever else you fancy.

Arsenal is through to the final of the Champions League, albeit fortuitously considering the chances that Villareal had in the second leg. They could just do another Liverpool and win it, but watching Barcelona hold AC Milan to a scoreless draw this morning, I seriously doubt it. I am a Manchester United fan of course, but I am also a fan of football. Thus, I feel that this year’s Champions League final is for the football fans, those who still believe in the romance of football.

I loathe Arsenal, but they do play pretty football. Surprisingly, in Europe, they have become quite Italian in their approach – very lean and mean in defence, relying on top class strikers to deal the killer blow in that very continental style of counter-attacking football. In Thierry Henry, they have that player who can turn a game in a blink of an eye – literally. His gazelle like sprinting, and nonchalant finishing makes him one of the most valuable property in world football. But my favorite player in Arsenal is Franc Fabregas, the 18 year old prodigy who is destined to be the next Xavi, his most likely opponent in the Final. EIGHTEEN!! Hell, even Wayne “White Pele” Rooney is 2 years younger than me. I feel old.

Barcelona, on the other hand, has impressed me since Frank Rijkaard took over. They epitomize what modern football is all about. People keep on harping about Barcelona’s attacking style, but I admire their organization and defensive solidity. Rijkaard has instilled the Chelsea-like 4-1-2-2-1 formation, and the trio of Puyol, Marquez and Edmilson provides the needed steel just like Terry, Gallas and Makelele.

They difference between them is the much admired, and adored – Ronaldinho. He is truly a player who can make football magic. Although I question the authenticity of the “Brazilian Ping Pong” video, I have no doubt in my mind that he possesses an array of skills necessary to unlock any defence in this world. Which makes me wonder – what if Peter Kenyon (before he turned to a Chelski) had forked out the extra 2-3 million pounds to take him away from Paris SG?

The amazing thing about all this is that in about 40 days time, the best players in the world will converge in the most anticipated sporting event this year – the World Cup. Tickets are sold out, hotels fully booked, flights fully full – the World Cup truly is a global spectacle. As before, I am sticking with England. Choosing Brazil would be too easy, but choosing Trinidad and Tobago is daft too as I have never seen them play. Nevertheless, as a second team, I would choose the impressive Netherlands. Equally impressive has been the United States, who I predict would surprise quite a few teams come this June.

SHOWTIME

There is this new show on Astro Ria called “Mobilku”, and it’s a bit of a rip-off from the popular MTV series “Pimp My Ride”. However, I like it, because it is new and fresh and there is no local show dealing with modifying cars yet. It’s definitely not in the same level as “Pimp My Ride” – both in terms of production quality and the level of modification, but the Mitsubishi Pajero they just modified looks great in that hot red Ferrari new coat.

Malaysian annual musical gala, the AIM, will be on this weekend. The AIM stands for Anugerah Industri Muzik – and it aims to award the “best” music Malaysia has to offer. The problem with award shows is that the award itself appears to escape the attention of viewers who concentrates more on the performances and what everyone else is wearing. This year’s edition is plagued with problems – ranging from lack of nominees to lack of promotion. But it’s another night where the artists can dress up and act like singers – which I believe some have forgotten in the middle of their antics in night clubs and gossips and affairs.

I WANT TO BE THE GODFATHER

I have never taken on to the Playstation, which is surprising considering that my family bought one of the earlier editions of Playstation 1 and 2. I believe that games are a bit childish, and I am always amazed whenever my friends play these mystical games, or combat missions and stuffs. I used to play Counter-strike a LOT, but recently my gaming adventure consist mainly of football-related games such as Chamionship Manager and Winning Eleven Pro-Evolution Series. However, recently I was introduced to this CRPG game called the Godfather, and I am hooked (which is bad news considering I am in the midst of my final exam). Perhaps this would spur a gaming fever, where I would go out and buy all those games that people have talked about. But for now I’ll settle with just extorting money, burning shops, killing people and be a mobster.


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As some of you might know, I was in Hong Kong last month for a week on a University-sponsored trip. I didn’t have the time to really “visit” Hong Kong, thus it would be wrong for me to conclude that it is uninteresting. But I noticed a few things: First, it appears that the people there don’t really bother dressing up as much as we Malaysians do. Perhaps I am wrong, but this observation was made from those countless trip on the very-efficient MTR service. The chilly weather probably didn’t help, as people don’t usually have that many fashionable winter clothes, but I personally think it’s more of the style-over-substance approach they adopt to most things. I mean, there’s more beautiful scenery in Putrajaya then what I saw over the entire week, but everything works, which is more than what I could say about some of our public service.

There is something else peculiar about Hong Kong, and it is the fact that there appears to be more cab on the road than private cars, especially in Hong Kong island itself. As I look down from the 10th Floor of the Hong Kong High Court, all I saw was a sea of red as the famous cabs darts its way around Hong Kong’s tight roads. It’s either the red-cabs or buses. Only two cars came to mind if asked to recall the memorable automobiles on show (as we car-freaks do talk about the variety of cars in places where we have visited), a Lamborghini Gallardo and the all-new S-class sporting a Johor-like registration plate.

This brings me nicely to my next point – the all-new National Automotive Policy announced two weeks ago. I thought it would never come. Time extensions and delays held up the implementation of our automotive policy that would bring Malaysia in line with the rest of ASEAN (which we should have done years ago anyway, but international covenants are as binding as the cheap duct-tape you get from pasar malam). As the announcement was made, Malaysians rejoice as their dream of buying luxury cars cheap may just come true. But it isn’t what it’s all it’s crack up to be.

The dust has still not still settled on the actual practical effect of the NAP, though Proton and Perodua was quick on the gun by announcing across-the-range price cuts. Volvo also quietly lowered the prices of its cars, and I heard that BMW, Mercs and the rest are following suit. The problem is that the savings from these discounts may not turn out to be that much; especially for non-cash buyers that constitutes the majority of car purchasers. A few days after NAP was proclaimed, the financial institutions quietly announce an increase in hire-purchase interest. This means, in effect, that for some vehicles, you might be paying more after taking a 10-year loan.

So perhaps you have to think things through before rushing off to get that new car you’ve been dreaming of. On that note, the brand new Honda Civic looks like a damn good bargain for its class – BUT therein lies the problem, It will be snapped up by every Sharifah, Shu Lan, and Shanti who adores Honda for the fact that it is damn reliable and that the trunk can fit the whole wet market. I don’t have anything against female drivers, but when I see a brand new SLK being driven by a Makcik at 40km/h, I get a wee bit jealous and pissed-off. They probably appreciate the fact that it is expensive, but that’s not the whole point of driving a good car. It’s about appreciating how it handles, how it moves, how it smells, how it sounds. A car is just a car if you treat it as a mechanism to take you from A to B. However, a car is more than just that, and it should be treated as something with soul. That is why for some, an Alfasud is way hotter than that souped-up Honda City with PCV Modulo bodykit. And that group deserves respect for understanding what driving a car is all about.

Interesting day in Parliament, where Dr. Rais Yatim created a stir by wearing a non-conventional attire which actually consisted of a Chinese collar shirt and suit. It’s the same thing with University requirements. Sometimes, in pursuing the letter of the law/rules, the enforcers forget the purpose behind it all – which is to look good and proper. Sometimes, a person wearing a nice fitting t-shirt can look better than the one who wears a badly fit bright yellow shirt. Sometimes a person who wears an open-collar shirt can and do look better than one wearing a tie. Just like in football, where the rule against taking off your shirt while celebrating a goal sometimes leads to some absurd decisions. But I guess without the rules, chaos would be the order of the day. You can’t guarantee that everyone will get that nice-fitting t-shirt now, could you?

Arghhhhh...help me. My area's officially declared as a dengue epidemic area!!! Stock up on the Ridsects, and sleep with those mosquito repelling coils. It doesn't matter now that it's a fire hazard, as long as those pesky blood-suckers get off my back. Cheers!

But back to the trip to Shah Alam. The trip itself was pretty uneventful. What interests me was my fuel gauge. I’m sure Kingdom of Blogs is filled with Malaysians grumbling about the increase in petrol prices. In actual fact, I was one of the lucky ones who managed to fill up my tank right before the price jumped to RM 1.92 per litre. Yeah, it’s two bucks per lit now. My fuel gauge is saying I should go visit Mr. Shell, but the odometer is saying I’ve only traveled 360 kilometers, give or take a few meters. This is absolutely pathetic.


When I first got my Jazz, it was doing around 550km per RM50, which is darn good value for money. Then the gradual increase in petrol prices, and the now regrettable change to 16-inch rims, pushed the figure south till it held steady at 410km per RM50. Now it’s barely reaching 400 kilometers, and that bothers me. I limit myself to RM50 for petrol per week, and thus far I’ve managed to keep it that way. But it looks like I have to fork out an extra RM 10-15 now, which in the grand scheme of things, isn’t too bad.

Some of you might thing I’m a bit daft for saying that, but just look around you. The jams are still there. Car-pooling is as foreign as Aston Martins on Malaysian roads. People are still going to the sundry shop in their motorcar. There’s a reason why Malaysia is the biggest passenger car market here in South-East Asia. We love our cars, and we somehow love driving it, though that does not necessarily equate to being good at it.

We will find a way to max out our petrol tank till the last drop, we will find a way to squeeze out that extra RM 10 from our weekly expenses, we will find a way to travel further on the same amount of fuel even if it means driving without air-conditioning, keeping all the one-cent change we get or leaving house at 5 a.m to avoid the jam. Malaysia boleh what! What we won’t do is suddenly take up public transportation.

Why? I can’t give you a definite answer, but there are reasons why you won’t see me on the next Citylink heading out to KL with my girlfriend. First and foremost, the routes are pretty much messed up. When news of the price increase spread, I asked my friend if there’s any bus from USJ heading to Shah Alam. Apparently, there’s none. You have to take a bus, stop at the Federal Highway, cross over to the other side, and wait for the bus heading to Shah Alam. From there, you take another bus to Section 2, where you’ll wait in line for UiTM buses to carry you into campus. All in all, it takes approximately more than one hour for the entire trip, without considering buses breaking down or you having to go for an emergency toilet stop.

And that’s just the bus trip. Let us not forget our wonderful weather, which of course I thank God for blessing us with, but that does not detract from the fact that the tropics is not exactly meant for walking. The humidity itself will render your G2000 pink shirt looking like you’ve just rescued a drowning person. The sunrays will burn your skin, and for god sake’s, we don’t need the tan. Oh, what about the days when the sun decides to hide it behind monstrous clouds that pour wonderful rain? Basically, it’s just not practical. It might sound pretentious, and a bit “manja”, but ask any normal-looking bus-riding individual if they prefer buses to cars, and the answer would generally be cars.

Frankly speaking, I am not against the increase. I understand the whole economics of subsidies, how it’s going to impede our progress in the future. I for one believe that Malaysians are over-subsidized, which is ironic coming from a UiTM student. But the lessening of subsidies must commensurate with other things. It is just not enough for the petrol price to increase, but other variables remaining constant.

Malaysia is slow in adopting diesel engines, which in modern cars have proven to be more economical, friendlier to the environment, and performs better too. Gone are the days when diesel engines sound like a sawing mill. Diesel is the way to go, while waiting for other viable alternative source of fuel. Cars having diesel engines should no longer be penalized with higher road taxes.

And when will the Government announce the much-awaited National Automotive Policy? Car buyers will wonder if there’s anything there that could cushion the dent in their wallet, perhaps by lowering duties on new cars and removing those protection that is actually a breach of our international obligation with regards to AFTA.

A revamp of the public transportation system is on the way. Consolidation of services would make for better managed transport system. It’s not that we should totally rely on public transport. Perhaps creating more mini-terminals all around major residential would help. These terminals could house 1,000 cars, and buses would travel direct routes to other mini-terminals. From there, feeder buses will deliver passengers to all the major stop points. The Komuter and LRT would be better if there’s a proper car park for car users to place their car, something like the Kelana Jaya LRT station.

I’ll leave the details to the policy makers. Perhaps even with these measures I won’t take public transportation, but others would, and lessening traffic would undoubtedly result in time saved from facing traffic jams which in turn would mean savings in petrol used.

Until then, if you’re used to bringing your girlfriend to Chilli’s once a week, try Papa Chop Mama Grill for a change. That will save you at least RM 20 per week. Maybe you don’t need that Movie Package on Astro, and that will save you another RM 15. Or maybe stop that gym membership, and start jogging around your residential area. Or simply order plain water every time you eat outside. You don’t have to choose to do all this. Choose one, and you’ve already covered your extra petrol expenses.


To Pak Lah, don’t apologize or try to give other incentives. It’s redundant if the Government reduces fuel subsidies and then using the money saved on other forms of subsidies. Just use the money to give us better, safer, more efficient public transport system. Just promote diesel cars, and invest in alternative fuel research. Just do things sensibly, with the outright interest of the nation in mind (and sometimes that doesn’t necessarily mean the interest of the people), and you’ll be fine.

I am not bitter, nor angry. I am just curiously waiting for the next roll of the dice. It’s useless to moan.

By the way, I’ll be off to Hong Kong on a University-sponsored trip. So adios and take care.

It’s now been close to 2 months since I last posted an entry in Undergrounduate. As some of you might have noticed, I haven’t exactly been “filling” in Senikami either. Once a week is pathetic, but none in two months is even worse. I feel as if I’ve let myself, and my readers down sometimes. Maybe those with a personal blog couldn’t care less about their readers but for a blog that aims to promote critical thinking (and in the process learning myself) readers play an important role.

Let me start by saying that the past 2 months have been quite simply, exhausting AND interesting. Readers of Senikami would probably know by now that I’m into my final year, known simply as my Honours program. Designed to teach us soon-to-be lawyers a thing or two about the practical side of legal work, it carries a reputation for pushing students to the brink of desperation and for some, madness (not that it’s a bad thing to be mad considering what’s going on with the world today). As a degree student, all I ever heard from the seniors was how tough Honours were for them.

It IS all it’s cracked up to be, and more. Simply because unlike our beloved seniors, my batch is the first batch with “god-knows-how-many” credit hours. I forgot the figure, but with one extra subject in the way, it’s not uncommon to find me stuck in UiTM till late at night. The surprising thing about all this is that I simply enjoy the coursework and the practical side of it. I kind of like typing out documents, legal briefs, preparing presentations (and there’s lots of presentations, trust me) and running around preparing files (conveyencing comes to mind). Yes, it might sound a bit boring, but it’s a whole lot better than listening to lectures.

And that’s the problem I’m having this semester (it seems I have a problem for EVERY semester). See, unlike my high-scoring sister, I can’t be bothered with lectures anymore, especially since I have realized that classroom knowledge means absolutely shit out there in the working world. I mean, I worked hard for my mooting competition, and I know what I’m capable of. I enjoy that sort of work. But what I can’t stand anymore is studying for exams. I thought when I’ve finished my degree, I won’t have to study anymore…I mean studying for an exam kind of thing.

Imagine my disappointment that exams and tests are still playing an important part in my curriculum. I just can’t, honestly I can’t, study anymore. The thought of opening up a book, learning things that I’ll soon forget, is just too depressing this year. I would rather stay up till 3 in the morning finishing up a mock property sale-and-purchase transaction rather than study for exams. Heck, I would rather stay up till 3 cleaning up my room than study. Which is a waste, according to my family and friends. Heck, if I don’t waste my time now, when else? When I’m 30, with a family to feed? Or when I’m 40, all stable with enough cash to splash around, but with a considerable gut, and graying hair? This is the year, this is the time, for me to fully discover who I am, where I stand, what I am made of…

So, no topics yet. I mean, it’s obvious to anyone with some semblance of intelligence that the whole proposal to ask dentist to advice smokers is a bit daft. I mean, people already hate going to the dentist anyway. And trust me when I say this, smokers definitely know that smoking is bad for them. They know it, and they don’t give a damn.

Go figure.

It has been a hectic 7 days for me, starting from last Thursday. I was involved in Nikki’s unique album launching project, which was an interesting and unforgettable experience. Not least the fact that for the entire weekend, I was surrounded by gays. Heck, even the girls aren’t straight!

I used to be a bit homophobic, and I guess a lot of straight guys out there are generally wary when it comes to dealing with gays. But the weekend sojourn to Bukit Bintang really opened my eyes to the fact that they’re really great to hang out with. I mean, there’s always this awkwardness with knowing that you’re talking to guys who would like to get into your pants, or girls who wouldn’t, but I had a good time.

And hey, after hanging out (not to mention sharing a room) with them for 3 days, I can positively say that I am straight. How many so-called macho men out there could really say that? You never know unless you’ve been tempted right?

At the end of the day, I am glad that I met them, and made friends with them. I can’t say for sure that I have now completely removed my prejudice against homosexuals, but I know with these guys, I have nothing but the most profound respect and could safely consider them as good friends. Period. Not gay friends, just friends.



I took this picture when I was walking along Lot 10. It’s a sad reflection on our society, on our nation, when in the midst of development, poverty still exist. I am not a big fan of beggars, especially those who suddenly appear along the roads leading to a Muslim cemetery during Hari Raya, but in this case I cannot help but give a ringgit every day. He can’t fend for himself; he definitely can’t work…where else could he turn to?

I used to really hate beggars, and the whole concept of begging. I was pragmatic, always thinking that if other people can work, why can’t they? But as years go by, I have seen that in life, it’s not always about choice. Choice is but an illusion, to a certain extent. Society shapes you in more ways than you can imagine. Who your parents are, what are they working as, where do you grow up, which school did you go to, how were you raised…this will ultimately shape who you are.

Which can only explain why, despite the fact that they watch TV, follow the entertainment scene, have seen pictures of people who dress well, and generally seeing other people dress well, mat rempits still choose to wear oversized striped fake Polo with tight jeans, boots and caps. Having a mullet is a fashion catastrophe, and yet there they are proudly looking like the estate version of Joe Dirt. In their mind, that looks good. They’ve been brought up, surrounded by, elements which says that looks good. Who could blame them then?

Back to beggars. I mean, I’m sure some beggars out there really are junkies and losers who would love nothing better than to earn some easy money looking sad at sidewalks. But I’m pretty sure as well that some of them are simply there because they’re motivated by desperation. The desperation to survive no matter what. Life is not always rosy, and when push comes to shove, you have to do what you have to do. What we as members of society should try to do is understand the root cause of poverty, how wealth should be distributed evenly to correct the social-economic imbalance, and ultimately, learn what it means to be human again.

….

The Malaysian public toilets are not only famed for its repugnant stench and visual aids on what constitutes shit and puke but also for its art. Art you say? Yes, art. No public toilet worthy of the term “public toilet” can escape from Malaysia’s very own Andy Warhols and Picassos. These artistic expressions come in the form of neatly CARVED engraving or, for those on “art-lite” mode, permanent marker pens.

Interestingly, I realized that these “artists” seems to attack only public toilets which offer the most-necessary “water-pipe” service. I might have missed a few cubicles here and there, but generally the toilets in Megamall and KLCC seemed to have escaped the wrath of these “artists”. Both these malls do not offer “water-pipes”. Instead, we have to put up with the very-cumbersome and messy bidet experience. It’s so non-Malaysian (or rather non-Malay) that I think most people when presented with these sorts of toilet prefer to just keep the horses in the stable, if you catch my drift.

Could this be the reason why they’re relatively free from graffiti?

In my humble experience pissing and taking craps at public toilets, I’ve seen all sorts of messages left for all to see. Most common is the “If you want sex, call…” followed by the phone number of their ex-gf, ex-bf, ex-friend, enemy, or maybe sometimes, their own number. Heck, I seriously think only fools would take the bait and give any of thought to calling the numbers. But since we’ve got fools who put them up in the first place, I won’t be surprised if the offer for free sex is taken up.

Next is the “Mamat was here…” message, perhaps the most innocent of all. Mankind is preoccupied with stamping their territory, and “x was here” or sometimes “x wuz ere” is another form of planting a flag on a piece of land that you’ve visited. Just like Neil Armstrong planting the American flag on the moon. Maybe there’s a “Neil was here…” somewhere on the moon, who knows?

Last but not least is the political message, usually short and succinct, punctuated by plenty of exclamation marks. “UMNO SUX…”, “Dr. M kroni rasuah…”, “Hidup Anuar….” – at least these used to be quite popular. But in the days of Pak Lah, there’s less political dissatisfaction amongst the “artists”. Usually the political nature of the message will lead to the most serious form of “art” – racists’ remarks.


I took this photo at a cubicle in One Utama. It might touch on a few raw nerves, and most people will dismiss it simply as idiots calling each other idiots. But I always view such unique ‘non-mainstream’ expression of individuality as an indication of a deeper, underlying social problem. You just have to hang out with a bunch of kampung kids to see where this whole thing is headed. Heck, even amongst my friends, who have been fortunate enough to experience the whole Sekolah Kebangsaan spirit of multi-racialism will somehow carry with them a certain tendency to regard others by the color of their skin.

Which is weird really, because there has never been a time when Malay, Chinese and Indian youths share so much in common. We all listen to the same music from the West, shop at practically the same stores, like the same football team, go clubbing at Zouk…and most importantly we are as detached from our real culture (example, how many Malays here still wear the baju Melayu other than during Hari Raya?) that assimilation seems the most likely conclusion. Yet, this is not so.

Maybe it’s because of these unrealized similarities we subconsciously want to stay attached to our identity as a Malay, Chinese or Indian. Our folks (just look at the friends who came by my grandma’s house in Penang during Hari Raya – Chinese and Indians in a true spirit of Muhibbah) learned to celebrate the differences in culture. They understood and see the different colors on the social fabric. “The belief that the character and abilities of individuals are correlated with their race is not necessarily racism, since this can be asserted without implying an inequality in value…” – quoted from Wikipedia. I guess this is true for the previous generation. They recognized the dissimilarities, which made it easier to see the similarities. Confusing eih?

Anyway, back to toilets. Did you guys know that in a recent Durex Sex Survey, public toilets have been named as the most preferred sexual location for Malaysians??? Ironic isn’t it when public toilet is also the first thing that cropped up most of my friends’ mind when asked, “What’s the dirtiest place you’ve ever been to?”…I guess it’s true what they say, sex is best when it’s dirty. I just didn’t realize that Malaysians take it oh-so-literally…

…

Yeeehaaaa… I’ve never thought that the act of sleeping without worries can give so much joy. I’ve suddenly learned to appreciate why simple people, people who live as they please, last longer than corporate-powerbrokers, lawyers and even doctors. It was simply amazing, more liberating than going out with friends, more peaceful than hanging out with your girlfriends, more satisfying than playing football because simply put – those things do make you worry. You’re worried what to wear, where to bring her, how to handle that tough centre-forward.

Sleeping without worries is often said, but seldom practiced. Trust me. I’ve spent countless nights wondering what time I have to wake up the next morning, when to finish my assignment, or simply what to have for lunch. But last weekend, the weekend in which I finally finished my exams, I slept without thinking about anything…seriously, nothing! Heck, it was so relaxing that I don’t even bother wearing clothes. Too much detail perhaps.

But the joy didn’t last for long. By Monday I realized that my car was way overdue for some serious servicing. In two years, I’ve managed to clock up 42 000 kms, not bad considering that Shah Alam and Subang (which my mom believed the only route I ever took) is a mere 15 minutes away. I don’t actually calculate how far I drove every week, but basically I covered more than what my mom does going to the office. This is why she’s pretty pissed.


Regardless of that innocuous background drama, I drove to the nearest (and admittedly very impressive - from the facilities to their customer service) Honda service centre on Tuesday without any apprehension as previously; I spent an average of RM 8 per service. Yes, as part of Honda’s great after-service promotion for new vehicles, users get free service for 2 years or 40 000 km, whichever comes first. This pretty much successful carrot for car buyers have been duplicated by other makes – Volvo, Alfa…they all now come with free service. But do believe that FREE is relative.

The guys processing the paperwork remarked that I’ve finished my free-service benefit, and since the car has reached 40 000, there’s plenty of work to be done. Changing of this filter and that, brake pads and what-nots. He said it’s going to be a bit expensive. And I figured since I’ve always paid less than RM 10, a bit expensive should probably be around RM 400-500 – expensive yet not unexpected.


“Hmmm…semua RM 1, 126…kita kena tukar ini, ini…” and as he pointed out the very expensive OEM-parts my brain stopped functioning. A GRAND! F*Ck! That’s like paying for the car’s monthly installment!!! I’m definitely not saying Honda is trying to cheat me of “my parents’ hard-earned money”, and I was kind of expecting this…but it still caused my heart to skip a beat. “Ermmm…okay okay…petang nanti saya ambik…”


And as I stood in line at the ATM (after a frantic call for an emergency Maybank2U third-party transfer), I wondered how the hell I’m supposed to afford paying for this sort of service plus paying the monthly installment if I’m a junior lawyer earning at most RM 2 000+ per month. I just can’t. My lifestyle, at this current moment, without trying to sound pretentious, is more than I could handle if I were to get a job as a graduate – even the most capable of graduates earn not more than RM 3, 500 working for someone other than their parents and cronies. It makes you wonder, it made ME wonder, if I would finally have to bite my tongue, and turn over to the dark side ie. work for my dad!

This is where dreams, and aspirations, have to be tempered with reality. On the one hand, I would love nothing more than to live life as a rock star, lauded at AIMs and Juara Lagu. I would love to direct a film, win some awards. I would simply love writing shit, and dirt, that people love to read. But alas, even the most successful of directors cannot compete with the financial might of a corporate giant. Even the most celebrated of rock stars must ask sponsorship for their concerts from big corporations. Let’s not talk about column writers, who are probably doing it part-time anyway. And let’s face it; if there were one thing I have learned to enjoy, it would be having money. Lots of it.

It might sound stupid; it might sound immoral and it most definitely sound like I’ve been spoiled. But at the end of the day, it makes perfect sense to me. Riches require sacrifices. Even if it's your dream.

...

Mine was absolutely confusing. A mixture of tension and calmness, sadness and happiness. I went there with a bag-load of books, but my good intention to revise for my finals went out the window as soon as I reached Penang. It is difficult to be the model of excellence in education when all around me everyone was in this whole festive spirit. It’s like going to a concert and trying to write down the lyrics while everyone else is busy head-banging. It’s like being in Baywatch and worrying about getting scorched by the sun. It’s like being in a honeymoon suite with Chalize Theron and thinking about paying for the room.

As they say, if you can’t beat them, join them! My mind wanders far too much during the one week we spent in Penang that by the time I got back to KL I wondered if I had actually studied that particular topic or not!!! On the other hand, I’ve just realized that Hari Raya really is a fun period. Perhaps I didn’t appreciate this fact before because I wasn’t burdened by something else, but I realized when I was holding my notes on one hand while sipping teh tarik on the other that I missed just lazing about in grandma’s house with some god-awful soppy Malay telemovie playing on TV.

When it comes to Raya, there’s nothing like a dose of reality-check for you people who have forgotten their roots, their culture, Islam blab la bla. And this reality-check comes from the ever-popular, but always-irrelevant Malay telemovies. For those of you who dismiss me simply as another urbanite who hates anything remotely Malay-like should realize that I do have a Malay blog that deals with “entertainment”. I enjoy my dose of crappy sitcoms like Senario sometimes and I do listen to Siti Nurhaliza, so rest assured that I am viewing this whole situation as neutral as possible.

Every year, every Raya, the TV stations will be busy putting up shows that will somehow reflect the Raya spirit or simply entertain the Malay crowd. All the TV stations want to capitalize on the common knowledge that during Raya the Malays will become dormant in their kampong watching TV for one whole week, and some more if they have extra emergency leave left. Seriously, my former-favorite Kelantan restaurant does close-shop for the entire month of Ramadhan AND Syawal. And people wonder why Malay restaurants seldom do as well as “mamaks”.

A permanent fixture for Raya is the ‘night-before-Raya-lesson-to-be-learnt’ telemovie. We Malays really are suckers for this sort of shows, as evident from the fixated look my relatives were sporting when Tikar Buruk (even the title sounds depressing) was playing on Astro. We know the ending, we know the moral of the story, heck we could even guess when and how that person will die, and yet there we are crying gently as if it is the first time we’ve heard of long-suffering parents being treated like shit by their children.

The purpose of course, is to enlighten the viewers, to somehow make them remorseful for their past sins and be good in the future. Good intentions seldom make an act good in itself. The execution and the storyline is so cliché that any part that purports to preach will invariably be ignored. I’ve got no problems with melodramas that preach goodness, but for heaven’s sake, I want some joy during Hari Raya please! And by Raya joy I don’t mean half-baked “comedy specials” that is so lame that I have to physically force myself to smile so as not to seem to waste my time.

But isn’t that amazing? The show’s lousy and yet there I am in front of the TV, unmoved, simply absorbing the images without it actually leaving any imprints in my mind. Minutes ticked by, hours come and go, and yet watching TV has become so ingrained in the minds of the public that it’s no longer considered as wasting time!!!

Back to the melodrama that aims to preach. Yes, my aunts will go “Jahatnya anak dia ni (The son is so mean)…”, “Cabai mulut baru tau (put some chilli in mouth)”..., “Rasa nak bagi penampaq (I feel like spanking him)…” and yet at the end of it they’ll sit around bad-mouthing another relatives or showing off some new bracelet. It’s as useless as the sermons in the mosque, but that’s a topic for another day (don’t jump the gun yet, till I explain this in my next entry).

Till then, where’s that Charlize Theron in honeymoon suite image again…hmmmmm

It is that time of the year again when yours truly will have to spend 4 hours driving to his beloved hometown of Penang trying his best to keep awake. We used to go together, as a whole family, until no car this side of the Third-World could carry all of us in comfort. Besides, another car means another trunk, and to the females in my family, this could only be good news.

But I am sad to say, without a shadow of a doubt, that I have lost my zest to Balik Kampung for Hari Raya. I don’t look forward to the Lemang and Ketupat and Serundings, since I’ve just realized that cutting down on all those carbs could probably add a few years for me to lead an active life and shave off a few kilos of unwanted flabbiness. So if food’s not your motivation (as it was last year), what is?

Maybe the loud Sahur gossiping session amongst the womenfolk while waiting for Subuh, or maybe the hot and humid tightly packed Grandma’s house, or it could be the queuing up to use the toilet, or to use the toilet and then be sweetly interrupted by your Aunt knocking on it asking if anyone’s in there (helloooo??). Raya itself is becoming a routine, and routines can only be good and interesting for a short period.

I’ve been celebrating Raya as a teenager for the past 6 years, at the very least. I guess I’m just waiting for the next step you know, the next stage in these Raya celebrations. You know the stage where you’re the one giving duit raya, and have people coming over saying “ampun” to you? I guess it’s just a sense of boredom, being stuck for the past 4 and ½ years doing the same thing every year studying the same thing meeting the same people.

Hari Raya will still be meaningful to many people. Some kid will probably be excited as hell receiving his first duit raya, not knowing that in years to come he’ll probably be feeling just like me. So I guess I was wrong in thinking that Raya is becoming boring. It’s still the same joyous occasion. Raya itself remains true to its roots. It is just me that’s bored.

Well, in any case, I would like to wish my readers (3 people…hahaha) a very joyful and worthy Hari Raya. Let’s not forget we are fortunate enough to celebrate it, so be thankful. Smile when you have to hear one more “bila nak kahwin?” question from your relatives. Heck, you’ll probably be doing the same thing when you’re 40 years old.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri. Maaf Zahir dan Batin.

On a more positive note, we began this week with the great news that Nicol Ann David has successfully won the British Open, considered to be one of the top prizes in International squash. I am truly proud of her achievements, especially this past one year where she has really benefited from the strict training regime imposed by her foreign coach. She and Ong Beng Hee are the two bright shining lights left in the darkness known as Malaysian Sports Arena.

Personally speaking, I think they have benefited from the fact not many Malaysians give a rat’s ass about squash. Malaysians fret and pamper the footballers, the sprinters, the hockey players while sports like squash and cycling takes a back seat. But people like Nicol or Josiah Ng should be spared from the limelight. It seems to be working. The SRAM has done a good job of finding sponsors, and it just goes to show that if you’re good enough then consequently the money will roll in. The sad part about all this is the fact that some States footballers are getting double what world-beaters like Nicol David is getting.

Remember what happened to our great badminton hope, Hafiz Hashim? He won a big event, gets recognition from everyone, greeted at the airport like the Beatles, given huge amount of cash and property – and now he is nowhere to be heard. Don’t worry, he’ll surface to win another Championship, and then go back underneath the sea of disappointments for a couple of seasons. That’s the trend isn’t it? Win just enough tournaments so that people won’t forget you, but don’t push yourself too hard less you get injured then you can’t drive that expensive sports car.

It’s all down to mentality, the winning attitude. I can’t really go too far into this area, because some of my comments and thoughts are pretty much inflammatory, especially to those who live and swears by rhetoric. Suffice to say, I get the feeling that our sportsmen don’t have what it takes mentally simply because they were brought up in an environment that does not promote education and knowledge. I’ve seen, met, and played with people who are not only talented, but also armed with intelligence and maturity but these people won’t take up sports as their livelihood. The ones who turn out for the State junior teams, the club sides, are also usually the ones who do not do well in school (general statement, without any credible data…just an observation). This is sad really, because during my days in high-school I can see for a fact that clever people CAN and DO play sports rather well.

Well, I guess important discussion as to how we can improve the standard of sports is too insignificant to discuss in parliament, as compared to which party called Nicol Ann David first. Just click here and read another example of petty arguments being raised in parliament. But perhaps we should encourage such display of immaturity. Have you guys seen the mass brawls that always happen in Taiwan’s equivalent to our Parliament? But they’re more prosperous than us, so I guess I should be applauding the MPs the next time they get into arguments.

On a lighter note, look at these balls MPPJ has put up at the junction in SS3, PJ. Another example of mindless decorative items filling up empty lands which are better served as a green lung to the already choking metropolis known as PJ. If you guys have interesting photos of such wasteful projects, do e-mail them to me at sikapitan@yahoo.com and I’ll try to post it in the site. Till then, let’s have a ball shall we…

I am glad that a reader asked my opinion on campus elections. I have been studying at a public university for the past 4 and ½ years (hello…no “carry” paper k? memang lama tauu…), and frankly speaking, every year the elections serve nothing more than to highlight how useless students’ representation really is. I know some might disagree, but this is of course a personal observation.

I never got involved in all these elections to be part of the Student Council, nor do I see any one of my peers really seeking out any post in it. Last year’s was a bit interesting, because one of the candidates was not that bad looking (chauvinistic pig anyone?) but every other election went by without leaving any impact on me or my colleagues. We still have the same problem with getting parking space for students, my faculty keeps getting shoved all over campus… I do not really see the “Majlis Perwakilan Pelajar” as really representing the voice of students. I know the perks of being in the whole set-up is that you get to go to overseas trips sponsored by the University (at least that’s the practice in my uni). Perhaps, and because I know one of my readers has just successfully been elected to be a part of this charade (congrats dude), they should bring up a few issues that have been bothering me lately…

Like students being hauled-up by the disciplinary committee for failure to vote in the said election. I remember this year’s election for that very reason – the threat of disciplinary election if you do not vote. Sad as it may sound, because everyone seems to think the student body is useless, there is no real motivation to go and vote. Some went simply because there are free drinks being handed out. Most voted because they hate the whole idea of being hauled-up. Weird, because I always thought the right to vote includes the right NOT to vote…

I am also concerned with the recent direction my University, and specifically my faculty, is taking when it comes to dealing with students’ attendance. Notices are made listing down students who have failed to comply with the strict requirement that you’re only allowed to skip 3 classes (lectures AND tutorials) per subject without any reason. These students are then forced to face the Disciplinary Board, with failure to do so resulting in them being suspended for the whole semester.

I find this whole idea of forced-attendance unnecessary. Maybe that is because there is every chance my name would be up there as well with hundreds of others. But more because I’ve discovered that if you find the lecture interesting, or essential, you would be more likely to go on your own free will. Take away the compulsory attendance bit, and you would still find students in lectures, not because they’re forced to, but because they WANT to. There are many types of students out there, and to assume that those who do not go to classes will not do well (though this assumption is seldom wrong) while those who attend every class do is just not right.

I believe that there comes a stage in a students’ life where it must be left to them to decide what they want to do. If they feel they can do well without going to classes, then so be it. What harm does this do to the University? The one carrying the burden is the student and the student only. It is his future. Would it make any difference if someone attends classes simply because he is forced to, and during class, he just dozes off? I can’t see why such a big fuss is being made over students who do not go to classes and did NOT do well. They should be concerned with students who DO go to classes and yet fail to deliver when it matters.

None of these is as important as getting us students proper parking place. I am sorry, this complaint might sound a bit “manja”. But to me, it is a reflection of a University’s ambition (or lack thereof), when they fail to realize the growing affluence of students and fail to take the fact that more young people are driving cars these days into account when planning and managing faculties.

This is not London. It is hot and humid. We park so far that by the time we reach classes we need a change of clothes (from the sweat, get it?). But anyway, despite these complains, I am more than thankful for the experiences that my Uni has somehow, inadvertently provided. When you complain, it does not mean you hate. Go figure.

It is sometimes liberating to return as a Social Commentator, as opposed to the entertainment-friendly, bubble-gum remarks typical of my other alter ego – Senor Elkapitan. Do not get me wrong. I enjoy writing in Malay, and I enjoy interacting with the multitude of personalities you would expect when you touch on something that most people have an opinion about – entertainment! It’s even nicer when you’re interviewed by a radio station, though at some point during the entire 60-minutes segment I wished it was for this blog rather than the other. There’s so much more inside this head of mine than AF, but rants and thoughts of an opinionated 22-year old Malay undergraduate is not exactly what the mass media wants…

For this entry, we will look at what is going on at that sacred institution of ours that grabs the headlines for many wrong reasons- Parliament. To the average laymen, Parliamentarians do nothing more than squabble and bicker with each other. At least, that is what you read in newspapers, and yesterday’s headlining Buletin Utama’s feed from the Dewan Rakyat reinforces this view with Kit Siang and RafidahAziz going head-to-head in a match akin to something from the WWE. It has been the headline for the past week, with even Barisan MPs showing their displeasure at Rafidah’s absence from Parliament.

I would have launched into a tirade if it were not for the fact that I believe Rafidah to be more than capable being the head of a ministry. My mom was a former employee at MiTI, and like I have previously stated – no one’s opinion is free from prejudice - and her words carried weight in my mind. Rafidah, as most who follows politics would grudgingly admit, is an intelligent woman who is often referred to as the Iron Lady for her strong will in performing her duties. She is not without fault, as is bound to be when you are in power for too long a time.

Power corrupts. There is a reason why a cliché is a cliché. No matter what power you hold, how small your post, you would somehow, someday, someway act in a manner that is beneficial to your interest. Remember your Ketua Darjah, who happens to be your best friend thus didn’t reprimand you for not lining up properly before class starts? Or your student leader, who at the end of the day, allows you to meet the artist performing for the dinner backstage? Or that old schoolmate who now happens to be the Head Security to some posh club and let it slide that you did not have the proper ID? You don’t shout “Hey, corruption” because it benefits you, and you don’t see anyone else gets hurt.

Me? I just look at it this way – if I were a minister, I cannot say for sure I would not help a few friends, bail out a cousin or two, and pocket something for when I retire. So should I hold others on a higher standard than what I would do? Who has the gall to say that if the Opposition comes into power there would not be corruption?

Do not get me wrong. I am not condoning corruption, much less encouraging it. Rafidah made mistakes, and I am glad the opposition is pointing it out. The notion of corruption-free governance is one that remains idealistic, but it should not be dismissed because it sets a goal, a target, and without targets, you have no purpose. And when you have no purpose, you’re better off living without rules and laws. This equals anarchy. It’s just that I find it amusing when people talk of corruption as if it is beyond them, that they’re above any forms of abuse of power.

Mawi in Parliament...again!

Do you guys know who Mawi is??? If you don’t then you either don’t subscribe to any form of news media, or you simply turn it off when you see a bald-headed guy appearing on TV. Mawi is the Champion of Akademi Fantasia 3, but more importantly, he IS the new ICON for the Malay community. I am not a big fan of Mawi, but as part of entertainment, he does have his appeal. I just find it amusing how this young man has come to the level of cultural icon in a period of 3 months. What do you think?

Well, Datuk Bung Mokhtar Radin certainly thinks highly of Mawi. He urged, in Parliament no less, that the Government exploit the popularity of this Johorean to get youths off from drugs and other social ills. Yes, that would certainly help wouldn’t it Datuk? Ignorance as to the nature of society, as to the cause of substance abuse, as to the psychological element of youths caught up in the tug-of-war between tradition and modernization leads to such simple solution. I do agree that celebrities involved in such campaigns can raise awareness, but tell me – whoever said drugs were good? Could you find an addict who would come up and tell you they genuinely thought doing drugs would cause no harm? A smoker knows the harm of smoking cigarettes. No use harping on the fact that drugs are dangerous.

Talking about smokers, I am pretty pissed off that the recent Budget did not impose a higher duty/tax on cigarettes. Rumors have it that by the end of this year, petrol prices will increase. Tell me now, what is more important – cigarettes or petrol? If the government were to increase the price for a pack to RM10, what harm would it do? Would farmers stop working because they can’t afford to buy cigarettes? Would the lorry drivers/bus drivers/taxi drivers launch pickets because they cannot enjoy their 20 sticks-a-day routine? Would the harm of increasing the price for cigarettes outweigh the advantages of NOT increasing the price of petrol? This is of course a very simple argument from an untrained economist, and I am sure the tobacco companies’ lobbyist has 1001 responses to this proposition of mine. But this is the thought of the average Malaysian, and isn’t that what counts at the end of the day?

This past week has been quite interesting. Grabbing the headlines would be another tale of Government Department’s mismanagement. And that’s what I would call this sorry episode: mismanagement. It all began with the report that a lavish RM 5 million farewell party was planned for an outgoing department head. The next day, Tan Sri Abdul Halil Mutalib, the Customs and Excise Department Director-General, admitted that he was the one the media was hinting at. However, he claimed that the amount was an exaggeration, and it was not going to be spent on road tours and such. Heck, he even lodged a police report claiming that there are parties out there trying to undermine his credibility.

Things started to look brighter for Tan Sri, especially when media report keeps stating that the Customs Department is out looking for the “mulut tempayan” (which implicitly suggest that there IS a rabble-rouser in their midst). However, it took a turn for the worse when Tan Sri lost his cool and somehow managed to include Datuk Seri Najib in his press statement. This did not go down well with Parliament.

I don’t know for a fact if there’s a plan for a lavish retirement party, nor do I care for Tan Sri Halil. What alarms me is the fact that for the past week, the Customs Department managed to “lose” RM 7 million in enforcement fines. Apparently, this was done in response to the Government and public pressure on their beloved Director-General. Whether or not this was orchestrated at the highest level, it begs us to ponder the integrity of Government Departments. Perhaps many Malaysians do not feel that this is such a big issue, considering the fact that for most of us, our encounter with Customs official is limited to the ones at KLIA or Bukit Kayu Hitam. However, let us just say that the Director-General in this case is not from Customs, but from the NRD, and they decide stop making MyKads… It hurts to see this sort of subtle “threat” by Government Departments because even though it is not really targeted at the public, the effect is all the same.

Another one bites the dust...NOT!

Another murder trial, another failure by the prosecutor. As a law student, it hurts to see our judicial system called into question. However, we must not be shy of calling a spade a spade. Noritta’s murder, Datuk Norjan’s murder and now Xi Jian Huang, the 14-year old Chinese national – the list is growing. High-profile murder cases are not getting the convictions. One of the purposes of having laws is to ensure that in the event of a socially unacceptable behavior, a sanction is imposed. This is part of human’s sub-conscious – the need for retribution.

And when one murder after another remains an open case, it begs the question as to whether we in Malaysia can literally “get away with murder”. It is wrong to impute guilt on the accused, no matter what we think of them. It is NOT their fault if they are freed. The burden lies in the hands of the prosecution. It is better to free 10 guilty men, than the imprison 1 innocent man. However, is it really the prosecution’s fault? The AG Chambers has been getting brick-brats from the public, but what about the police?

The prosecution acts on the investigation by the police. When they initiate an action, the prosecution relies on the fact that they have preliminary evidences to indicate a connection between the crime and the suspect. The police collect these evidences. Malaysians are known for their “tidak apa” attitude, and sometimes this reflect in the manner the investigation is being conducted. Sometimes it hurts to see the prosecution present flimsy cases that appear so elementary to even legal undergrads.

But it must be remembered, the task of the defender is much easier. All they need is to plant a seed of doubt in the judge’s mind, and the burden of proving beyond reasonable doubt is a heavy one on the prosecution. The defence attorney can devote their time to study every aspect of their client’s case, their only case, their priority. It is easier to protect an individual, then to prosecute many. That is one of the problems facing the prosecution – they do not have enough people.

Regardless of all this, there is a sense that sometimes, with proper planning and enough episodes of CSI, anyone with the right modicum of intelligence can commit a crime and get away with it. And that, ladies and gentleman, does not augur well with my conscience.

Don't hold hands, don't sing, don't wear skirts...

On a lighter note, in another example of social engineering (and wasting time), the Energy, Water and Communications Ministry will set up another committee to draw guidelines on reality shows. Apparently, there is a need to change the format of shows to suit local needs, traditional values, societal norms, unity and national integration. Which leads me to the question: what are Malaysians’ local needs and societal norms?

We are nice people who are polite to each other and don’t touch the opposite sex unless we are married? Are these really Malaysian values or are these merely the aspiring values that we so-often hope would become true? It is hard really to pinpoint what actually are Malaysian values. The trend of globalization meant that it is harder for a country, a region, a race to have a totally distinctive set of values. Japanese youths lap up violent video games just as much as your 13-year old kid. That German 16-year old is busy showing porn to his friends, just like that 30-year old petrol pump attendant in your neighborhood.

I’m all for promoting the correct values. But isn’t it too late to cancel Malaysian Idol or AF since you guys allowed American Idol or Baywatch to be shown on our screens?